Internet Resources Empower Long-distance Caregivers
(ARA) - John is 82 and
lives in Manhattan. Since the death of his brother, he regularly
checks on his 87-year-old sister-in-law who lives about 90
minutes away. She has dementia and needs help with daily needs.
An aide lives with her, but John is concerned the help is
getting burned out. The last time John visited he noticed his
sister-in-law’s condition was worsening, and he wonders what he
can do to help.
John is a long-distance caregiver, one of an estimated 6.9
million Americans who care for someone living at least an hour
away, according to a study by MetLife and AARP. Americans age 85
and older numbered 4.2 million in 2000, the fastest growing
segment of the population according to the National Institute on
Aging. By mid-century, as baby boomers transition from being the
caregiver to needing care, that segment is estimated to swell to
21 million.
“This is a national problem with local solutions,” says Nora
Jean Levin, executive director of Caring From a Distance (CFAD),
a non-profit organization for distance caregivers. CFAD’s Web
site, www.cfad.org, extends resources and advice to caregivers
like John who e-mail their questions and concerns or search the
site’s many resources and links. Help from CFAD is also
available by telephone at (202) 895-9465. CFAD helped John
consider other solutions such as assisted living, finding adult
day care facilities and calling a home care agency to arrange to
give the live-in help a break.
Levin understands that despite the obstacles of time and miles,
distance caregivers are in a unique position to help.
“Long distance caregivers can offer perspective because they
aren’t on the scene every day to really observe small changes,
and that perspective is very valuable,” she says. “Sometimes if
you’re in a care situation day after day, you feel overwhelmed
and hopeless and you can’t see out of that box. But a person who
comes in from the outside can help pinpoint a problem and
recommend ways to help improve the situation.”
Levin offers these tips to buoy long-distance caregivers:
1. Offer help.
Lend a hand solving problems that daily caregivers may not have
time to think about. Shop for gadgets that help with daily
needs, like telephones with large buttons or “grabber” devices
that help seniors reach items they need. Make arrangements for a
handicapped permit. If appropriate, help manage finances and pay
bills.
2. Don’t be a “swooper.”
It’s really hard when you’re the daily caregiver and the long
distance caregiver swoops in and tries to change everything.
Instead, plan time for listening to problems and perhaps for
handling a few, and spend quality time with your loved one.
3. Make observations, but be careful how you share them.
“Retain respect for the individual who needs care, and be
mindful of preserving personal dignity when every step towards
dependence may be viewed as loss of control,” Levin suggests.
4. Visit and look for changes that indicate a need for more
care.
Is your loved one eating regularly? Is personal hygiene
slipping? Are prescriptions unfilled or forgotten? A helpful
checklist, “Ten Warning Signs: Your Older Family Member May Need
Help” can be found at
http://www.cfad.org/library/HolidayFactSheetFinal.pdf.
5. Use the Internet to ease a transition.
“Transitions can be rough or smooth, depending on the nature of
the situation, whether it’s a crisis or something that’s been
coming gradually, and the nature of the person being cared for,”
Levin says. Transitions to senior housing are smoothest when
approached proactively, before a crisis arises.
For example, long-distance caregivers can screen more than
60,000 housing options online by visiting
www.snapforseniors.com. The SNAPforSeniors online search tool is
like the Multiple Listing Service for senior housing.
Long-distance caregivers can narrow the search by geographic
location, care needs, type of facility and personal amenities.
A new tool from SNAPforSeniors and the Alzheimer’s Association,
the Caregiver Conversation Checklist, helps families discussing
housing options. The checklist, which can be found on alz.org,
offers tips for determining if long-term care is appropriate and
explains how to broach the conversation.
“The possibilities offered by the Internet to help long distance
caregivers are fabulous, and we’ve made our Web site a portal
for people looking for solutions,” Levin says. “SNAPforSeniors
is a site designed to help families deal with the housing part
of the picture. Long-distance caregivers can also get help from
CFAD when investigating other local personal and community-based
resources like home care, daily money managers, eldercare
lawyers, or geriatric care managers to coordinate activities or
even where you can donate a wheelchair.”
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Courtesy of ARAcontent
